Monday, July 14, 2014

Stand up and BE a Man


      
      I believe in friendships and the power of building healthy ones that bless us forever. Each day as I meet men that struggle with building healthy relationships, I am grateful for the knowledge of what friendships can be. I believe that we can and should encourage and develop healthy relationships with other men.   

      Men need other men. It has been so since man was created and will continue so forever. It is part of the Plan. My message is for men to "Stand up and be the men God intended us to be. Men of character, men that are not afraid to love other men in the healthy, wonderful way God intended". Stand up reach out and open your hearts. 

     Our society today keeps us from developing great relationships.   We live in fear of what others think and because of that fear we deny ourselves and others the opportunity of great relationships.  In today's world they teach us that we cannot have healthy relationships with other men.  We are taught that if we feel strong attractions to other men, we must be Gay.  We have been taught that we cannot have close relationships with other men.  So we keep our distance and avoid relationships that could bless our lives in great ways.  

     I remember my very first best friend.  I have to admit I was 18 years old before I had a best friend.  I lived in an abusive environment and did not have many friends.  In fact during high school it was really hard.  Anyway at the age of 18 I met this man.  I will call him KW.  KW was amazing.  The minute we meet we were friends.  Instantly we were inseparable,  no matter where he went or where I went we were together.  Every spare moment we could find we spent together.  I would get up and work with him at 2 am in the morning and he would come and work with me at 10 pm at night.  I was a permanent fixture at his house.  I adored him.  Could not take my eyes off him.  And the best part is that I knew he loved me.  It was an amazing experience for me to have a best friend.  I am sure it was an experience for him to have such a needy friend.  I could not get enough of him.

     He was so good for me.  He built my self esteem in so many ways.  i remember one night he brought a gift to me at work.  It was a Cross pen set.  I was so happy.  The employees asked why he gave me a gift.  I said "I don't know,  I guess he loves me".   The wrong thing to say.   Instantly they made rude remarks about us being gay.  That was the last thing on my mind.  I just knew he loved me and that was that.   I learned just what society thinks about that type of relationship.  Society makes it hard to have deep meaningful relationships.  

    That friendship started 35 years ago and guess what, KM is still my best friend.  I adore him even more and we have shared many memories over the years and I love his family and he loves mine.  Our friend ship is one that only increases with time.   We can go months without even seeing each other and the very moment we are in the same room it is just like we have never been apart.  One time his wife called after we had spent some time together,  she cried as she explained that when KM and I are in the same room she felt like she could cut the love with a knife.  

     KM and I have never had the desire or feelings of an inappropriate relationship.   Yes we hug and enjoy being close together and I can hardly stand it when he is around , I love him so much.  Our friendship has increased in love and depth over the years.   It will continue to increase for the rest of our lives and I am sure forever.   KM is my personal testimony of the value of good healthy friendships that we can have with other men.   I am so grateful for men like KM that are not afraid to express and act upon normal feeling for other men.   

    Great friendships can be had and enjoyed forever when we set aside our fears and embrace our God given ability to love others.   Men,  stand up and don't be afraid to love another man.  Done in the right way those relationships can and will bless your life forever.  

Have a great day.  Brad

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